Entry tags:
a fishing date;
There were no impromptu trips to Sundermount, in fact. Merrill had holed herself up with the Eluvian, avoiding Hawke whenever possible. The Arulin'Holm stayed at the estate, locked away somewhere, and the Dalish woman didn't want to see or hear from Hawke without good cause. Which was understandable (upsetting, but understandable), and she let Varric and Isabela take over Merrill's undertaking. They'd update her whenever possible and she was infinitely grateful, though she knew things couldn't stay that way forever. Eventually, they'd need to talk, and that would happen when Marian was good and ready. For now, she wasn't.
First on her mind was Anders and his mage underground. He would disappear for days on end, surfacing only to work in his clinic where he would refuse to go on any errands. Too busy, he'd say, occupied with his patients and his manifesto. It didn't stop him from pressing worn papers into her hands at every opportunity, the bastard. Her desk was full of Anders' scrawl, damning evidence if anyone should walk in and ask about it. She'd been certain to lock them in the bottom drawer, out of sight and out of mind, but she couldn't put him off any more than she could push aside the trouble she had with Merrill.
With her hands full of Kirkwall's smaller troubles - bandits, a few raiders on the outskirts, and a blood mage or two - she had nearly forgotten her plans with Cullen until she returned one night to a note on her desk at the end of the week. Even such a simple thing was enough to brighten her mood considerably and she packed that evening, though she wasn't to meet him for two more days.
She used the time to tell only a few that she'd be gone from the city, that no one was kidnapping her, and that she'd be very cross if she came back to find Kirkwall burning in her absence. Only Isabela and Varric gave her a hard time for her attempts at discretion, asking for details and gaining nothing.
By sunset on the second day, she was down by the docks to meet him, a pack slung over one arm and her blades across her shoulders, her eyes on the ships and the few workers lingering around. She couldn't be too careful, even now.
First on her mind was Anders and his mage underground. He would disappear for days on end, surfacing only to work in his clinic where he would refuse to go on any errands. Too busy, he'd say, occupied with his patients and his manifesto. It didn't stop him from pressing worn papers into her hands at every opportunity, the bastard. Her desk was full of Anders' scrawl, damning evidence if anyone should walk in and ask about it. She'd been certain to lock them in the bottom drawer, out of sight and out of mind, but she couldn't put him off any more than she could push aside the trouble she had with Merrill.
With her hands full of Kirkwall's smaller troubles - bandits, a few raiders on the outskirts, and a blood mage or two - she had nearly forgotten her plans with Cullen until she returned one night to a note on her desk at the end of the week. Even such a simple thing was enough to brighten her mood considerably and she packed that evening, though she wasn't to meet him for two more days.
She used the time to tell only a few that she'd be gone from the city, that no one was kidnapping her, and that she'd be very cross if she came back to find Kirkwall burning in her absence. Only Isabela and Varric gave her a hard time for her attempts at discretion, asking for details and gaining nothing.
By sunset on the second day, she was down by the docks to meet him, a pack slung over one arm and her blades across her shoulders, her eyes on the ships and the few workers lingering around. She couldn't be too careful, even now.
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He gave her his profile, chin slightly lifted. "Decoration? Like this?" Glancing at her from the sides of his eyes, he quirked a half smile.
All of the teasing words died away in the kiss. He had believed all of the desire wrung from him for a time. She was quickly proving him wrong. Part of what made it so nice, so easy to fall back into, was their isolation. There were no other lights in the waterway, no fires in the distance. Just the gently rocking boat and the rising moon kept them company.
He fumbled for the apple core to toss it over the side. He wanted her to have both of her hands free just as he did. He gathered her against him as the kiss continued, sensation he could all but drown in if he allowed himself. "Remind me why we never did this sooner," he murmured, never breaking full contact and then kissing her too hard to allow her to answer right away. With the way another smile fought to curve, it was almost a certainty it was deliberate on his part.
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She laughed, admiring him openly. "Absolutely. All noble houses have suits of armor in them with the family's crest, don't they? I'll just have an attractive man in it."
There were worse things than being almost forcibly silenced by a pair of lips and, frankly, she didn't want to protest. She wrapped her arms around him and leaned against his broader, stronger body. The hand that had not been occupied by the apple moments before threaded into his hair as she savored his kiss far more than she had the fruit
A muted hum buzzed against his moath in response to his question, pleased. She laughed breathlessly as they parted only long enough to breathe, her lips still brushing his. "I'm blaming the Qunari for keeping me distracted," she murmured, even if it was only a half-truth.
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The fact that she was busier than he most days made him feel better about it overall. There would never be the perception that he wasn't prioritizing. They both had larger concerns, like it or not. He kissed the corners of her mouth, her chin, and a soft spot of skin just beneath her jaw, rocking upward slightly beneath her.
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She smiled and leaned into him, tilting her head back just enough so he could have better access to her. With a sigh, she turned her head to nip beneath his ear. "Next time we do this, we need more room. Or a slightly bigger boat." To have the ability to see more, do more to him, would need to wait.
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He lipped a little lower down her throat when she gave him the room for it, made a soft sound when she nipped him, slightly rueful. He rested his head against her, stubble brushing her neck. "I know. I honestly didn't expect we'd need the space. Next date will end somewhere with a decent sized bed. I promise."
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That stubble of his had her making a quiet sound in her throat, unbidden. She kneaded at his shoulders in response, practically smirking. "I wasn't expecting it, either." Not that she was complaining at the direction the evening had been taking. "I'm going to hold you to that, Cullen," she said, and her voice was low in a mimicked threat. She might just see how many shades of red she could get his face to go through without even saying a word to him while he was out in the Gallows.
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He toyed with a small lock of her hair behind her ear. Having limited space just meant he had to pick and choose where to touch more carefully. "Besides, there's something to be said about finding freedom in constraint." That was something with which he was very familiar, although not usually on a physical level.
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Hawke's smile twitched, edging on a faint laugh as he toyed with her hair. Close to her ear, it tickled and distracted her. "That's... Yes, I could see why you'd say that." Finding freedom in constraint. That sounded very like him. She took his face in her hands and leaned down to press another kiss to his lips, one that was nearly tender if not for the brief scrape of teeth at the end. "I'll admit, I like the idea of getting to find out more about you." About what he liked and disliked, what he favored in a lover and what he sought in a partner.
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It wasn't the first time that night she had been surprisingly tender. He gave a half smile for the little bite at the end, almost a warning not to get complacent. He liked that, too, more heat flaring in his look. "I don't think you'll have a hard time getting that out of me." For all of his reticence in public and his professional facade, in private he had always been more open with those he believed he could trust.
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Her gaze flickered back to his eyes, to that look he gave her. The one side of her smile ticked upwards. "I don't think I will." He was honest enough in conversation that she could hope he'd be honest in other ways. Everything she had garnered earlier from him - from those heated looks to the way he twisted when she touched him - would be kept close. They were each a piece of what he wanted and liked. "Just don't pretend you like something when you don't."
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He leaned in again, lipping softly at her earlobe. She had seemed to enjoy it earlier. He gave a gentle flick of tongue and sucked very lightly before tracing up the edge of the outer shell with both his lips and tongue. He held her sideways across his lap so that she could lean into the embrace of his arm and chest and sprawl a little if she felt like it.
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She pressed close, more than content to keep in the circle of his arm with chest against her, even as he teased at her ear. It had her shivering once, lightly, and she closed her eyes. "There's one thing," she murmured appreciatively, her hand running down his front.
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He caressed a hand down her side when she shivered. It was the small reactions he enjoyed the most, the little things beyond control. He kissed back down to her earlobe. "At least we don't have to rock the boat for this," he murmured.
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For a man who claimed he didn't have the time to go out much or to be with others, he certainly knew how to surprise her with little intimacies she wasn't expecting. "We don't, thankfully." It was almost whispered, warm. She turned her head to press her nose briefly beneath his chin. The stubble tickled her, naturally, but she didn't laugh this time.
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"If I wasn't afraid we'd ground the boat, I'd be tempted to head inland for a while," he said. "I don't know the tides well enough, or the coastline. Already you have me contemplating dangerous things."
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A hum passed from her lips to his just before they parted and she glanced up, thoughtful. "We'd be leaving ourselves open in the dark to a possible attack, anyhow." She wished she could throw caution to the wind; he'd sparked her curiosity with talk of dangerous things.
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"I will make it up to you when I can." He shivered lightly at one of the nips to his lower lip, tipping his head back and to the side to offer his throat. "Hopefully, it won't be a long wait." His hand against her side wasn't idle, rubbing a slow caress from her hip up to her shoulder. One of the things that he already knew he wanted was to be able to see her while touching her, to learn her by sight and feel both.
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She dipped her head down to press her lips to his throat with slow, sensual kisses, lacking the urgency of before. "If we start counting who's owing whom," she started, lifting her eyes to look at him, "then we're going to have too long of a running tally to work with." Her mouth found a spot beneath his jaw to press another kiss to, careful not to linger too long on any patch of skin that would be visible in armor. "It'll be easier next time." And next time, she wouldn't have to ask him to stop in the middle of their coupling.
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His breath came in swifter, less even measures, and he found himself having to fight to focus on the conversation. "Maybe hard to keep track but fun...ahh...trying." His sentence trailed off in an audible gasp. "That feels..." He hissed another soft inhale and nodded his agreement. It would be easier. Maker, she was destroying his concentration.
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Her smirk was probably obvious against his skin as she heard him lose his focus. "You could keep trying," she said lowly. "I owe you for earlier." That was punctuated by an open-mouthed kiss over his pulse point. Her fingers dragged down his chest, one hand coming to rest on his side for leverage.
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"You owe..." he started to question, eyes widening when he realized what she meant. "Oh, sweet Andraste." It was an odd sensation to feel flustered and aroused at the same time. He honestly couldn't tell which had more heat coming to his cheeks and upper chest. He turned his face, lips brushing the side of her head.
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She made her way down his throat to his collar, pressing faint kisses at the hollow of his throat. She couldn't help chuckling when he swore, fingers tapping against his side. It would normally mark itself as a nervous habit, her need to always be moving and doing things coming through. But here it was teasing, the pads of her fingers dancing over his ribs.
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It was hard to remember why he had been nervous in the Gallows, except perhaps the unexpectedness of it all and the bold proposition. He found it amusing now and was glad it hadn't been some elaborate prank. Even after the first dinner, that had been a small fear at the back of his mind. He couldn't imagine anyone taking a prank this far. Well, perhaps Isabela, but had she made such a proposition he wouldn't have agreed in the first place.
"You know, it...it has been a really long time since..." He cut off, shrugged, and smiled slightly. "A long time."
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So long as he was enjoying himself, she had no concerns. She slowed as his breath caught in his throat, smiling deviously. Her eyes wandered, looking for a suitable place to perhaps leave a reminder for him, one that wouldn't be evident in his armor. Oh, the options she had... Hawke's gaze slid upwards, from his throat and to his chin before she straightened herself to look at him fully.
"By choice? Or... Well, I suppose a Templar's schedule hardly leaves room for a love life."
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Something about the way she eyed him sent a pleasant shiver through him. He refrained from asking what she was thinking just then, preferring to be surprised. One corner of his mouth twitched up in a wry expression for her question. "I don't know that I set out not to get involved, but I wasn't looking and had no intention of doing so. You fall into a routine in this job. It makes sense, and you start thinking you don't have much to offer someone. There aren't many people willing to come second to duty, even if they believe in what you're doing. So I just...don't usually give it much thought, which means something like this is few and far between."
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so. um. head's up: I might be losing internet at home.
Oh no! :( I'll still play with tagging at whatever pace you need to go if you're able.
You're sweet. :( We'll see what the status is when I actually get home.
I'll keep my fingers crossed for you. Sorry you have to deal with this. :(
Thanks!
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So far so good! We'll see what happens tomorrow, though.
I'll cross my toes, too!
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